


The Mockingbird Sings Her Own Song

by PrincessaKyla



Category: Batman: The Animated Series, DCU (Comics), justice memes (tumblr) - Fandom
Genre: Abuse, Angst with a Happy Ending, Antisemitism, Autism Spectrum, F/F, F/M, Family Issues, Fluff and Angst, Homophobia, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Jason and Kara don't make an appearance until like chapter 8, Joker is the batman animated series version mixed with Heath Ledger, Justice Memes future, Lucy gets revenge, Lucy is Autistic, Mention of Gore, Past Abuse, Past Joker/Harleen Quinzel, Past Rape/Non-con, Revenge, The Batfam, Vigilantism, chosen family, implied conversion therapy, joker is an asshole, shock therapy, violence to animals, violence towards animals (mentioned but not seen)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-15
Updated: 2018-07-23
Packaged: 2019-03-19 04:40:30
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 10
Words: 11,661
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13697058
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PrincessaKyla/pseuds/PrincessaKyla
Summary: Having spent her childhood surrounded by the Batfam, Superman, and her mothers, Lucy Quinzel has already grown into a strong hero dedicated to protecting the crazy city she calls home. When her maniac of a birth father, Joker, returns to attempt to get her to join him in the life of chaos and crime, Lucy declines. What follows is an antagonistic chase she is determined to finish as the last one standing between them so that she and her mother may finally be free.





	1. A Beginning

**Author's Note:**

> This fic is set in the future of the Justice Memes canon on Tumblr. Currently, Lucy is five and I have set her birthday in roughly mid-August (as far as I can tell no birthday date is mentioned for her in canon although there are panels where Harley calls her from the Arrow Cave to say happy birthday). We have also just played that Lucy has in fact developed mild super powers of imitation, hence her future vigilante name being Mockingbird. This fic is also going to touch on the future engagement of Wally West to Dick Grayson (they both proposed on the same night when accidentally sent back from about this point in the future to where we currently are in game) and includes Harley and Ivy being married. There is also mention of Ellen Kent, the oc daughter created by our Superman and Lois.   
> One last note, Harley and Lucy are observant Jewish women. While there won't be a whole lot of discussion of it, there will be some. Most likely in the discussion of weddings.

Lucy grinned as she leapt from rooftop to rooftop, long blonde hair streaming behind her as she raced towards Harley. On either side of her across the dark streets of Gotham, Dicky and Boo did their own acrobatics. “I’m gonna win,” Dicky crowed over the comms. “And then you two owe me laundry for two weeks each.”

“In your dreams bird boy,” Boo said.

Rather than say anything, Lucy just doubled her efforts and managed to land on the rooftop in front of Harley a good 30 seconds before her brother and their friend. “Wondered when you two would catch up,” she teased.

Dicky sighed. “Alright, Mockingbird. Live it up while you can. We’ll rematch next week.”

“What, so then you’ll owe her four months of dishes instead of just the 3 you already do?” Boo asked. She snorted. “Such an idiot.”

“Guys, I hate to cut the fun short but we just got something on the scanners,” Harley said. Tapping her comm, she gave Tim the go ahead to share what he had.

“Someone’s been dropping laughing gas around the city, not too far from you. Most of the cannisters are too empty to do much but one or two have been pretty full and we have one report tonight of a woman being taken to Gotham Medical for reasons emts haven’t had to list since Joker ran these streets. So be careful.”

The four on the roof shared a look. “I’ll stay here as a center point,” Harley said. “From what Tim told me before you all arrived, the perp is headed our way. Fan out, keep eyes and ears peeled. Hopefully it’s nothing more than someone who’s found an old stash. Lucy, stay center. I want to be able to keep good eye line with you.” It was obvious, despite her best attempts, that Harley was  _ scared _ . This was so eerily reminiscent of her past that it was impossible not to be. The three young people shared a quick look, and with a nod, took off. Lucy leapt ahead, clicking on the scanners built into the lenses of her mask.

“Guys, I got someone coming down the roofline of west 39th at a pretty good clip,” Lucy said, coming to a halt and sinking into the shadows behind a gargoyle. “Headed towards me.”

Before the others could respond, a very eery, if familiar voice rang out. “Luuuuuuuuucyyy. I’m baaaaaack!”

Lucy immediately went stock still. In her ear she could hear her mother going crazy on the comms, cursing as she ran after her. “Momma, hold back,” Lucy murmured. “I don’t want us to be easy targets.”

“Oh come on, Lucy, don’t you wanna give your old man a hug? Daddy’s hooooome!” the Joker taunted. She peeked around the gargoyle to see him standing on the roof across the street, arms stretched open as if actually expecting a hug. “Now this is really no way to behave, Lulu! I’m not in the mood for games. I expect you to come say hello with a hug when I come visit.”

She stepped out into the light of the street lamp, arms crossed. “Fuck you.”

He gasped. “Such language. Why I ought to wash your mouth out with soap and have a word with your mother. Her discipline has really slipped while I was away.”

“You’re not my father,” she said firmly. “Never have been, never will be. You are my mother’s abuser and rapist, my sperm donor. Nothing more.”

“Oh come now, Lulu.” The nickname dripped with derision and she gritted her teeth. That was Clark’s name for her. No one else’s. Certainly not this asshole’s. “You are a child of chaos. No one else is ever going to really understand you, not like I can. I can teach you beautiful things, beautiful jokes! Things that will make people laugh so hard they cry. We can dominate the world, you and I.”

“Not interested.” She felt more than saw Dicky and Boo come up on either side of her. Dicky put a reassuring hand on her shoulder, squeezing slightly.

“Oooh, bad choice, Lucy-lu. But I’ll get through to you eventually. You’re stubborn, like your mother. I like that. Give her my regards, sweetums. We’ll talk more later.” And with that, before any of the three of them could move, he was gone in a flash of smoke and a bang.

Lucy stood there a moment, looking at where he had stood, chilled to the bone. It had been years, almost a decade, since she last worried she was like him. She refused to let him undo so much hard work. “Let’s go home,” she muttered. “That asshole won’t be back tonight.” She trudged off, the others following silently behind.

_ ”You’re just like him,” _  the voices taunted. Lucy delivered a terrifyingly strong roundhouse kick to the mannequin. ” _ You’ll end up hurting everyone you love.”  _ That earned a left hook. ” _ Your mother is terrified of you _ .” She flat out tackled the mannequin then, screaming in rage.

“Um, Lulu,” Clark said from the doorway, sounding concerned. “Ya okay?”

She whirled around, crouched low in a fighting stance, panicked glare on her face. He held up his hands, and she relaxed as she took in that it was him.

“Oh. Papa. Hi. Sorry. Um. Yeah. Yeah, I’m okay. Sure.” The words sounded empty and fake to her own ears and she winced, sighing. “No. I’m not okay. I...he got to me. The asshole really got to me.”

Slowly, so that he wouldn’t startle her, Clark came over and pulled her into a hug. 

“You are not him, Lulu,” he said gently. “Not now, not ever. You are  _ you _ , 100 percent. And who you are? Is a very intelligent, lovin’, considerate daughter who I am very proud to call mine.”

“Thank you,” she breathed, so softly that he wouldn’t have been able to hear it without his super hearing.

“Always, kid. Now.” He pulled back to look at her. “Scale a 1 ta 10, where ya at?”

She shrugged. “Maybe a 6?”

He winced. “That bad huh?”

She shrugged again. “He’s a major stressor for the anxiety and the Autism. I was at a 9 when I got home.”

“Well at least you’re comin’ down,” he said, clearly considering something. “Need a sparrin’ partner?”

An hour later saw Lucy, dripping sweat and breathing hard, squirting her water bottle over her head to cool off. “That was so helpful.”

“Good. ‘M glad,” Clark said. He turned a fan to face her and was rewarded with a goofy grin. “Where ya at now?”

“Mmmm….like a 2 maybe. 2 and a half. Most of the excess energy is gone.”

He nodded. “Your ma’s goin crazy ya know.”

Lucy sighed and flopped onto the mat. “I figured. It was doing a lot to keep it together for her as we came home. I needed space and I told her that.”

Clark sat next to her. “I know. But she was...well she worries you’re gonna have a meltdown alone, I guess.”

“Oh,” Lucy snorted. “Yeah because a 15 year old with a therapist, a psychiatrist, and a psychiatrist for a mother can’t handle a meltdown alone.”

“Now ya know that’s not fair, Lulu.”

“Maybe not but I can handle myself. I go out on patrol alone, I go to work at WE. I know how to manage.”

He sighed. “I know. But it’s our job, especially your ma’s, to worry about ya.”

She turned her head slightly to look at him. “I know.” 

“Ready to come back to the rest of us?”

“Yeah, I guess. Ellie still awake?”

He shook his head. “She crashed hard after the recital. I’m sure she’ll tell ya all ‘bout it tomorrow.”

“Cool. Good to know.”

Rising, he held out a hand and, once she’d taken it, pulled her to her feet. “You’re a good kid, Lulu. Remember that.”


	2. A...Gift. Of Sorts

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A package for Lucy arrives at the manor. It is not what she was expecting.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning for what is basically attempted murder of Clark and all the other Kryptonian/half Kryptonian characters, even if it is short and not actually a very good attempt.  
> Warning for disordered eating. It is also short (even shorter mention than the Kryptonite) but people deserve warning.

It was a few weeks later, when the incident with the Joker was mostly forgotten from everyone’s minds as best it could be, that the first “present” arrived. Alfred was the one who brought it in, along with the other mail, handing it over as he sorted packages and other assorted mail.

“Wha’s that, Lu?” Dicky asked around a mouthful of cereal.

“I dunno.” Carefully, she pulled back the brown paper around the outside of the package to reveal brightly colored wrapping paper. “Huh. Guess Janey sent my birthday present early,” she said. “Probably got scared it would be held up at customs.”

Harley smiled fondly. “Well hopefully you’ll be able to visit soon,” she said.

“Yeah…” Lucy said, clearly distracted by the package. She peeled back the wrapping paper to reveal a plain, metal box, with a hinged lid. Knowing something wasn’t right, she opened the lid, and screamed before slamming it shut. 

The whole family was immediately in a flurry, Damien moving in with a knife as Clark snatched Lucy and Ellen away. “What’s wrong, Lu?” Dicky asked.

“K-kryptonite,” she stuttered. “M-more than one color.”

Dicky moved closer, finding a card tucked into the paper. Opening it cautiously, he scoffed disgustedly and threw it down. “Joker.” He stormed off angrily, probably to go check the mail system for flaws, and Tim moved in to look at the note.

“My dearest Luce,” he said. “I wanted to give you another chance to prove your loyalty to me as my daughter. So as a way to apologize for missing so many birthdays, here is a range of Kryptonite shards with which to take down that alien trying to usurp me from your affections. All of my love, Daddy.”

The room was silent until Lucy softly said, “Get rid of it.” Her voice was bitter and cold. “Destroy it entirely. And find a way to send a message. I will have no part in his schemes.” She gently extracted herself from Clark’s arms and, head held high, made her way to the back staircase, presumably to go to her room.

“I’ll kill that bastard if it’s the last thing I do,” Tim said grimly.

  
  


Lucy didn’t come out of her room the rest of the day. When people knocked there was no answer. When it was time for food, it was left outside her door and when someone came to retrieve the tray later, it had been picked at. Harley wanted to barge in and check on her, talk to her, but Clark stopped her. “Harley, she just needs time,” he reminded gently. “The man’s been gone almost 10 years. She spent a good portion of that time unlearnin her demons an’ tryin to learn how to control her powers. We gotta give ‘er some space.”

Harley wilted. “I just…”

“I know,” Clark said, giving her a hug. “But we cain’t protect her forever. Gotta let the baby bird learn how to fly.”

When Lucy finally emerged the next morning, it was obvious she had been crying, and her palms showed the signs of meltdowns and stress. Tim gently doctored them, before Harley could see just how bad it really was.

“Thanks, Timmy,” Lucy whispered, not looking at him.

“You’re welcome, Luce.” He kissed her forehead reassuringly and put the first aid kit away. “Scale of 10?”

“Five.” She couldn’t bring herself to speak more than a hushed murmur, and her voice was raspy. He handed her some water, which she downed quickly. “Five.”

“What do you need from us?” Tim asked gently. “And remember that it’s okay if you don’t know.”

She shrugged, listless. “I just need a break.”

“We can do that.”

And that is how Lucy ended up spending a week in blanket forts and pillow castles with various family members keeping her company. All of her mail was screened double, triple the normal amount, and phone calls were monitored. Harley hovered anxiously until Lucy asked her to either sit and relax or go to work. Clark took a day off to stay with her so that Harley felt she was safe and could go spend a day doing hospital rotations. 

“I wish she wouldn’t do that,” Lucy said, staring into space.

“She is worried,” Damien said. “And for good reason. Your father is a madman.”

“He’s not my father,” she said, voice firm.

“He is the one who impregnated your mother. Therefore, he is your father whether you wish it or not.”

“He is  _ not _ my father!” Lucy snapped. “He donated the sperm and nothing more. My mother did everything possible to protect me from him and yet here we fucking are!”

Damien was unphased by her outburst. “I apologize for upsetting you.”

“You’re fine,” she grumbled. “Just don’t ever say he’s my father again. Papa is my father. Dad is my father. That...insane clown is no kin of mine.”

Damien considered a moment then nodded once. “I see my error. There has been a...miscommunication of sorts. You place different weight on the perceived role of “father” than I do. I will keep that in mind moving forward.”

That startled a smile from her, and she looked at him. “You’re a good brother, Dames.”

He smiled back, a rare occurrence. “And you are a good sister, Quinzel.” He paused. “Lucille.”

Dicky, determined that no one was going to hurt his sister, was busting ass to find a lead. “There has to be something,” he muttered, paging through hundreds of news articles and police reports.

“Maybe Shield has something?” Babs asked, already clicking into their database.

“Maybe. He had to go somewhere while he was gone. Our scans and files only cover our particular cities and the Fortress of Solitude. So he could have gone any number of places.”

Babs sighed. “Guess we’d better knuckle down then.” 

Hours of searching, both within Gotham and without, turned up very little. There were some possibilities in Brazil, an incident or two in Europe. But nothing they could solidly tie to the Joker. Dicky angrily hit his desk chair, causing it to spin wildly. “This feels useless.”

“Maybe we can get the others to help?”

Dicky shook his head. “No. Kara and Jay are busy with their kids and Metropolis, Damien and Carrie have Bludhaven to deal with. Wally has Star City. And Barry retired to be with Iris and their kids. Everyone else is trying to protect Lucy and Gotham.”

“Dicky. We’re all family. We wanna help her.”

Taking a deep breath, Dicky counted to ten and back. “You’re right,” he said, eyes closed. “Sorry. Old habits die hard. Even after such a long time.”

“I know,” she said softly. “Trust me I know. But we’re gonna figure this out. And when we do...well I don’t think anyone’s gonna be able to stop his death this time around.”

“I have more than a feeling that you’re right.”


	3. Sweet 16

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Joker's birthday gift for Lucy arrives, but so does an actual gift she likes.

The first present wasn’t the last. Lucy had mostly bounced back to herself, going on patrol more regularly, pulling her usual pranks, complete with her spot on impressions of people (“There’s a reason we call her Mockingbird,” Harley reminded Ellen one day when Lucy had impersonated Lois) when the next one came in.

This one came in a padded envelope and had brightly colored tape sealing it up.

“We can’t find anything dangerous,” Babs said, handing it over. “But we’re pretty sure it’s from him.”

Lucy swallowed hard and took the package from her, holding it in her hands and staring at it. “Should I open it?”

“Might have some clues,” Babs said. “But you don’t have to. I can always take it down to the cave and open it there and you never even have to see it.”

Lucy considered then shook her head. “No. I’ll open it. Someone hand me scissors.” A pair was placed in her hand and she carefully slit the tape before handing them back. Harley put a serving tray in front of her. When the others looked at her questioningly she shrugged as if to say “Dunno.” Cautiously, Lucy tipped the envelope and dumped its contents onto the tray.

A mirror and card slid out, looking deceptively benign. She took up the card first, distaste obvious in her delicate features. “My dearest Lucille,” she read, voice shaking. “I know that the teen years are tough, and that media can make it seem like anything other than a specific set of features is not “pretty”. So if you find yourself feeling blue, hopefully this mirror will help. All my love, Daddy.” Setting the card down, she picked up the mirror and snorted. “It’s a handheld fun house mirror. Of course.”

“It’s not a bad idea,” Harley said softly. “Just sucks he’s the one to offer it.” She paused, and her voice was even softer when she spoke again. “I guess he listened to some things I said after all…”

“It’s an excellent idea, Momma,” Lucy agreed. “But I’ve never been insecure in my looks. So I think maybe we put it away, yes?”

“I’ll make a locker for this,” Babs said helpfully. “Something tells me it’s not the last.”

And she was right.

The next one came in August, just in time for Lucy’s birthday. It was a giftbag, in a box, stuffed with brightly colored tissue paper. The card, written in the same spiky curls as the last two, read, “Dearest Lucykins,

As the time nears for the celebration of your 16th go ‘round the sun, I find myself regretting that I have missed most of your life, that I am not there for you as a father should be. I know you’re home schooled but I would hope that your mother would allow you the chance to attend the Gotham Citywide Prom, and that your date is a young man of character and good humor, like myself. Traditionally, your date should present you with a corsage but I hope you might instead wear this one, designed for ultimate laughs for years to come. I prefilled the tank with a love potion I got from a witch I truly trust, but there is a spare you may fill with just about anything.

Truly all of my love,

Daddy.”

Her eyes narrowed and she handed the bag to Tim. “Open this under the fume hood for me,” she said. “I don’t trust him and I don’t have the clearance.”

“Of course, Luce.”

As he walked away, Lucy sat, stewing over just how much she would like to fuck up this asshole ruining her life.

 

Harley tried to talk her out of the party, she really did. But Lucy was not having it. “Momma I’m not going to stop living my life because of him.”

“But baby, this is prime time for him to —“

“The party is happening.”

And that is how, on a warm night in the middle of August, Lucy found herself surrounded by friends and family in cocktail wear singing happy birthday in a horribly lovely cacophony before she blew out the candles on a massive cake. The crowd cheered and then Alfred stepped in to help the wait staff cut and serve, offering Lucy a fond smile as he handed the first piece. She kissed his cheek, murmured thank you, and moved away to catch some air. 

As she stood watching the others, a quiet voice next to her said, “Some party huh? I hear the birthday girl’s a real priss.”

Lucy squealed and almost tossed her cake in her rush to set it down and hug the girl next to her. “JANEY!”

Jane laughed and hugged her tight, chuckling. Catching Harley’s eye over Lucy’s head she gave a thumbs up that they were good. Harley laughed and got back to helping the rest of the party. 

“Oh my God,” Lucy said quietly, laughing as she quickly wiped away tears. “You’re really here. Like, here.”

“I’m really here,” Jane said, chuckling a bit. “In the flesh. And hey, no crying.”

“My long distance girlfriend made it to my birthday party. I think I’m allowed to cry. Plus it’s my party.”

“And you’ll cry if you want to? But I didn’t even walk in with other girls on my arm.”

Lucy laughed, really laughed for the first time in a couple of months then, and Jane smiled, quite pleased with herself. She kissed Lucy’s forehead. “I’m so glad I made it in time.”

“How long are you here?” It was clear Lucy didn’t want to ask, was scared of what the answer might be, but she had to know.

“Well, my school doesn’t start back until mid-September so….I think my plane leaves on the 15th?”

If anyone had doubted that Lucy was a soprano before that, their doubt was appeased then as she squealed at a pitch that would surely rouse the bats from the cave and threw her arms around Jane’s neck. “I love you and oh my GOD best. Birthday. Ever!”

Jane laughed and held her close, dropping a quick kiss on her nose, smiling. “I’m glad you’re happy, baby.”

“I am beyond happy,” the blonde corrected. Somewhere behind her, Harley and Ivy shared a look, so glad Lucy was happy and remembering their own excitement as a young couple in love. 

“Okay now I’m sure your parents would like to actually talk to me,” Jane said. “And I can see Brett holding Lissa back. You can keep me all to yourself this whole next week if you want but right now we’re being horribly rude.”

“Stop being right,” Lucy grumbled, frowning.

“Nope. This is why you love me. I remind you to be the best you.”

Rolling her eyes, Lucy smiled and led her favorite person in the world over to the others.

 

The next morning broke to find Lucy curled tightly into Jane’s arms, face hidden in the crook of her neck. Jane was gently carding her fingers through Lucy’s hair, humming under her breath as she watched the other girl sleep. It was peaceful, almost serene, the morning light just creeping past the edge of the curtains to turn the room golden. The party had run late, and Jane was exhausted, but jet lag was a bitch and thus...here she was, awake, because her brain was still on Paris time.

Lucy shifted and cracked an eye. “Why’re you ‘wake?” she mumbled, pressing closer.

“Jet lag,” Jane said softly. “Go back to sleep, baby, you’re exhausted.”

“Stay?”

Jane smiled. “Yes, I’m staying right here,” she reassured.

“Mmmkay,” Lucy said, already falling back to sleep as she snuggled closer.

Jane managed some light dozing off and on as she let Lucy sleep, and by the time Lucy woke for good about nine, she felt better rested and adjusted to the time difference, although she knew it would take a few days to really be adjusted. “I don’t know how it’s possible that you keep snuggling closer,” she murmured, teasing.

Lucy’s only response was to snuggle still closer and tickle her ribcage just a tad.

“Lucy!”

“What?”

“Tickles!”

“What? I’m not doing anything.”

“Bullshit! I surrender!”

With a grin, Lucy stopped tickling her and kissed her gently. “Surrender accepted.”

“What am I gonna do with you?”


	4. A Signed Death Warrant

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Is it really any surprise the Joker is a homophobe? At least Jane is here to make it better.
> 
> TW: INTENSE HOMOPHOBIA, VIOLENCE TO ANIMALS/PETS (not shown/explicit), MENTIONS OF ABUSE (not explicit: i.e. mentions of bruising)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So now shit has hit the fan and it is about to start getting REAL INTENSE. Please note, there are TW in the chapter summary. THOSE ARE NOT THERE FOR NO REASON. PLEASE PAY ATTENTION TO THEM. This is the first chapter that really needed TW (although chapter 2 had a couple warnings, they weren't exactly TW more content warnings) and I suspect from here on out, pretty much every chapter will have one until the last one or two which will be fluff with little to no angst

Jane had been in Gotham for close to two weeks when the next present arrived. Harley had already left, having an early appointment to discuss a hospitalized patient, and Clark and Lois had taken their three children — Conner by not quite force — plus Babs to the Kent farm for a weekend, so it was just Pam and the kids mostly, although Bruce and Selina both made their appearances, and Dinah and Talia were around. Dicky was the one to find and look over the package this time, putting it through some convoluted process of scans and tests before handing it over with an apologetic look.

“It’s early,” Lucy said, dread clear in her voice and features. “Very early.”

“Which is why everyone but me and Mama are leaving the room,” Dicky said firmly. Jane gave Lucy’s hand a squeeze and moved out of the room with Tim and Damien. Cass and Steph went out the other way, where they could grab things from the Cave if needed.

“Whenever you’re ready,” Pam said gently.

With a deep breath, Lucy started to unwrap the package. It was a plain cardboard box, sturdy but well worn. There was a faint smell, which grew stronger as she lifted the lid.

What she found inside made her gag and run for the trash can to vomit profusely. Wondering what on earth it could be, Pam peeked inside and recoiled in horror at what she found. Inside was a pair of dead cats, mangled and clearly tortured. She found the card taped to the side of the box and carefully peeled it off to read it.

“Oh, Princess,” she started. Dicky growled at his nickname for her being used in such a horrific manner. Pam continued. “I find myself quite disappointed in your choice of...partner. I know your mother has been raising you in a very untraditional household, full of freaks and perverts —“ Pam’s voice was shaking, out of anger or fear or both Dicky and Lucy couldn’t tell “— but I was hoping that my genetics would win out when it came down to sexuality. I don’t know who the little hussy you seem to think yourself in love with is, or where she came from, but I recommend walking away from her. Chaos has limits, my dear, and usurping the natural order of man and wife in favor of wife and wife is one of them. I did my best to rid your mother of the urge and failed. I wish to not have the same failure with you.” Pam paused, centering herself to finish the note. “Maybe it’s time I try to teach her her lesson again. All of my love and hopes for a normal daughter, Daddy.”

Before anyone could say much of anything, Lucy turned and vomited again.

It took an hour to run out of hot water, and another 20 minutes before it ran cold. Even then, Lucy stayed put in the shower, shivering under the spray as she hugged her knees to her chest. Her lips were starting to turn blue when Jane forced her way into the bathroom by picking the lock and turned the water off. Grabbing a towel, she wrapped Lucy up and easily picked her up to move her to the bathroom counter. “Luce, look at me,” she murmured. “Look at me, please.”

Lucy barely managed to move her eyes to look at her, struggling to maintain the eye contact, gaze flicking away constantly.

Jane swallowed around the ache in her heart. “Hey. Who gives an actual flying fuck what that asshole says. I love you. And if that means I have to go face off with the Joker well then gimme a suit and some guns.” She brushed Lucy’s hair back cautiously. “You are so  _ *so* _ much better than him. In every way. And we have your family, your  _ *real* _ family on our side.”

“I hate him,” Lucy said softly. “I thought I hated him before but...him making me scared to be out of the closet is the last straw. I hate him. I’m gonna kill him. And I’m gonna enjoy it.”

Jane nodded. “We’ll all be there to catch you after okay?”

Lucy looked up at her then, really looking at her. “Thanks for loving me.”

Jane smiled. “How could I not?”

 

The rest of the month they had together was spent trying their best to ignore the ever looming threat of the Joker. It had grown noticeably since the threatening package received at the start of September, with Dicky, Babs and Tim working triple time to figure out how Joker was getting information he should not at all be privy to in any way. Jane did her best to keep Lucy distracted, dragging her into games and taking her out to shows and movies. They always had someone tailing or outright chaperoning them, of course, but they didn’t mind that too much. Lucy always loved it when her moms joined them and they made it into a double date. It gave her a glimpse of what her future could be. Happiness, with someone who understood her neuroses and didn’t care when she needed a break, just helped her take it, who understood that some things were too difficult to attempt alone. Gentle head kisses in some corner booth of a diner. 

Jane was more and more certain, with every instance of affection she saw pass between the two older women that she wanted that with Lucy forever.

“How did you know you wanted to be with Harley forever?” she asked Pam one day, as they lounged in the garden watching their respective significant others run the outdoor gymnastics course with Dicky. 

“I feel like I should tell you you’re too young,” Pam said, voice carefully neutral, looking ahead. “But I’ve known you long enough to know that you’re stubborn. And let’s face it. Dick and Wally have been together since 13 and now they’re tying the knot so.” She looked at her then, rolling her head to the side. “I knew I wanted to be with Harley forever the day she showed up on my doorstep, soaking wet, clearly covered in injuries from the asshole, but she had still taken the time to find a plant baby that needed my love and care to bring.” She swallowed and looked at Harley, laughing as she joked around with her children, before looking back at Jane. “We had been friends for ages, but we’d started getting closer over the year she was laid up pregnant, and that was the night she had finally left him after having been back for a little while. And I was who she trusted to protect her if he decided to come after her. Me. Not Batman, who would have, or our Nightwing, or Selina. It was a sudden realization that we were each others’ safe havens, and that I wanted her to always have that in me.”

Jane considered, then said, “I knew that first double date. That moment when Harley was laughing so hard she nearly snorted coffee and Lucy looked so proud of making her that proud and you were so amused at them. I want that. I want to be sitting across from our kid one day laughing our butts off at some joke they made.” She paused. “And I want her to always know that I’m there to catch her at the end of the day. That when she’s overwhelmed at the world, when she needs a small, quiet place where the world can make sense, that I can do that for her.”

Pam smiled. “Then you have my blessing. And Harley’s.”

“I— what?” Jane looked surprised.

Pam snorted. “We’re vigilantes, kid. You think we didn’t know you bought a ring?”

Jane blushed hot pink and pulled the brim of her sunhat down to hide. Pam just laughed. “Welcome to the family kid.”


	5. The Descent Into Madness

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Wherein both proposals and threats are made.
> 
> TW HOMOPHOBIA, SHOCK THERAPY

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay so if you haven't noticed by now, Joker is using the nicknames Lucy's family has given her in all of his notes. In this one, the nickname Lucy Loud is one from a family friend named Lexi (based on the tv show The Loud House). Lulu is Clark and sometimes Dicky, Princess is Dicky and Babs, Luce is Harley, Tim and some others, Lucy Lou is Maddie (another family friend and Lexi's girlfriend), Lucille is Damien, and Lucykins is Kara.  
> As usual, please pay attention to the trigger warnings in the summary above. We're moving into the final countdown.

It was Jane’s last night in Gotham and she had, with Pam and Harley’s help, planned a very romantic evening for herself and Lucy. “Dinner in the conservatory,” she murmured softly to them, watching Lucy work on some math problems Tim had set her as a warm up. “Followed by a movie in the media room and a late night walk through the gardens whiiiich I have strung with about a million and two fairy lights because I know how much she loves them and also because Dicky said he would never forgive me if I didn’t.”

Harley chuckled at that. “Sounds like him. I think he’s overly fond of romantic things.”

“You’re one to talk,” Pam said.

Jane smiled, and when Lucy looked up to be sure everything was okay, Jane gave her a reassuring wave so she would go back to her math work. 

“Anyway,” Jane said. “I need one of you two to distract her this afternoon. Just for an hour or two while I make dessert and set up the conservatory. Alfred is being a true wonder and making us dinner.”

“We can do that. Hell we can probably get you two hours if we go with giving the cats a bath.” Mama Fluff looked up with a decidedly unamused look from her perch on the window seat. “Don’t tell the kittens,” Harley whispered. The older cat mewed and seemed to roll her eyes.

“Great,” Harley grumbled.

That evening saw the sun turning the conservatory golden as Jane led Lucy in, towards a secluded corner draped in light colored fabrics to look like an airy canopy or tent. 

“Oh my….” Lucy said, in awe. “You did all this yourself?” she asked.

Jane waggled her fingers. “Magic is real helpful.”

“You can say that again,” Lucy said distractedly. “This is...oh wow. I love it baby. So much.”

Jane smiled and pulled her chair out for her. “And just wait. It’s all gonna get even better.”

They spent dinner laughing and feeding each other, just enjoying the romantic glow. When they finished dessert — chocolate strawberry cheesecake, Lucy’s favorite — Jane offered Lucy a choice. “So, I have the media room basically reserved for us,” she said. “We can watch whatever. And then I wanted to take a walk through the garden. Which would you like to do first?”

Lucy considered. “Walk. If we tried to watch anything right now, I’d fall asleep.” 

“Then a walk it is!” Jane smiled and held out her hand, beaming.

They stepped out the conservatory doors into the garden and Lucy was again floored. “Oh my god,” she breathed. “I...wow. Just. Wow.”

Jane laughed and gently tugged her forward. “Come on.” Lucy trailed after her, too shocked to offer even a joke at how in charge Jane was. They made their way through slowly, talking in soft voices and pressing close as they walked.

“I feel bad,” Lucy said. “Here you came to visit me and I wasn’t gonna plan anything special for tonight just cuddles and you went to all this effort.”

Jane smiled, starting to get a bit nervous. “Nah. I did it because I wanted to remind you how special you are to me.”

“Well consider me very well reminded,” Lucy murmured, pulling her to a stop for a sweet kiss. Eventually, they made their way to their favorite fountain and stopped. “This is so gorgeous,” Lucy murmured, gently dragging her fingers across the surface, watching how the floating candles bobbed gently.

Jane took advantage of her momentary distraction to pull out the ring box and drop to one knee. When Lucy turned back to check on her a moment later, she gasped. “Jane…”

“Lucy, you have been my best friend since we were five and six years old, and my girlfriend since we were fourteen and kissed in front of this fountain when I told you I was moving to France. You are my favorite person in the world, and I know I’m always safe with you. I talked to your moms and they seem to think those feelings are mutual. So would you do me the honor of saying you’ll marry me in a few years?”

Lucy, who was wiping away profuse tears, nodded frantically. “Yes. Oh my god yes,” she said, sniffling. 

With a grin, Jane slid the ring on the appropriate finger, before standing and pulling Lucy into a kiss that made both their heads spin a bit. As they parted, Jane’s grin returned full force. “Knew you’d say yes.”

 

Lucy stared at the ring on her left hand, trying not to cry. It hurt so much every time she and Jane had to leave each other, but now she had a small bit of physical reassurance that it was only temporary. Bruce had offered to let Lucy ride along on the flights to drop Jane off, but they had all known that would only put off the suffering. Better to face it head on.

As Bruce had loaded her luggage, Jane had kissed Lucy quite soundly. “I’m coming back for Spring Break, and then Maman said she would be very happy for you to come visit next summer. She misses you.”

Lucy jumped, startled from her memory by a gentle hand on her shoulder. She looked up to see Lois, smiling softly. “Sorry about that, kiddo. It’s time for breakfast.”

“Oh. Okay Mami.”

Lucy followed her to the kitchen, drifting along like a lost leaf. She took her seat at the table and Clark put a bowl of oatmeal in front of her, along with some bacon and eggs. “Here, Lulu.”

“Thanks Papa.” She started picking dejectedly at her eggs for a moment before munching a piece of bacon. She had made it through her bacon, and some toast she had traded her oatmeal for when the package arrived.

She sighed when she saw it. “I’m eating my eggs first,” she said crossly. “Then I’ll open the fuckin package.”

“Language,” Clark reprimanded, more out of habit than anything else.

“Not even sorry.” Quickly, Lucy ate her eggs and then stared at the package. It was small, even smaller than the corsage had been.

“Why does something so small feel so threatening?” she asked, not to anyone in particular. 

“Because he’s a jackass,” Lois said, shooting Clark a look when he opened his mouth to scold. 

Lucy hummed in an acknowledgement and pulled the package closer, carefully undoing the twine around it. Pulling off the lid, she reached inside, almost immediately recoiling with a startled cry of pain.

“What happened?!”

“Shocked me,” she managed, tears welling up in her eyes as she clutched her hand to her chest. “Badly.”

Harley immediately ushered her off to the Cave to check for damage, while Clark carefully pulled the box apart. Inside was a small hand buzzer. He paled. “Dicky, Babs, get something to put this in, nonconducting. And don’t let Harley see it. I have a horrible feeling.”

As they raced over with a piece of tupperware, Clark gently pulled the note out from under the buzzer. Picking up the whole box, Clark sat it carefully into the bowl, and then began reading.

“Dearest Lucy Loud, I am so disappointed you didn’t follow my advice. Maybe you feel you can’t? If that’s the case, try this on for size. It’s one of my favorite gags: a hand buzzer that packs a real punch! When having unsavory thoughts, one can simply press the button or touch the metal side for a shock designed to knock them right out of your head. Your mother should remember it. I used it on her often, but maybe not often enough. Perhaps you two can course correct together.”

“He sent me shock therapy,” Lucy said from the doorway. 

Clark glanced at her and nodded. “‘Ppears so.”

“That fucker sent me shock therapy. Oh my fucking god. I know you and Dad don’t really approve of killing but when I get my hands on him, he’s dead meat that I am then feeding to Momma’s hyenas.”

“In this case, I think it’s justified,” Clark said. 

“Papa!” Ellen said, shocked. 

“Between me and Bruce we’ve tried to capture and rehabilitate him too many times to count. There’s no doin.”

The nine year old nodded, looking back at her oatmeal. 

“This is war.”


	6. A Middle

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Holidays are supposed to be a fun time, right?
> 
> TW: HOMOPHOBIA, ANTI-SEMITISM, CRUELTY TO ANIMALS (attempted), HOLOCAUST MENTIONS

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wheeeewwww this chapter was a doozy and a half to write. For the gifts I was shooting for full on Jared Leto, so that was creepy and I'm not actually sure how well I succeeded. Joker is also somewhat losing his funny bone in this one but it'll be back in full force after.  
> Oh and remember how I mentioned that Lucy and Harley are Jewish? IT FINALLY MADE AN APPEARANCE. Also we get a brief glimpse at Harley's mother, who I named Esther because it felt right.

The next few months continued, with increasingly more hateful gifts being sent. A can of toxic waste with a note to “Enjoy the pick me up, Lulu!” A box of bullets “for your brother Jason’s gun, Luce.” A pack of drinks designed to make you vomit and a gay porno “because you still aren’t learning your lesson, Lucykins.” For Christmas and Hanukkah he sent several things in multiple boxes. Lucy opened every. Single. One.

“First one. Cat food, likely poisoned, or laced with something,” Lucy said. “He apparently really hates cats.”

Babs snorted and carefully moved the cat food out of anyone’s reach.

“Second one...a TENS machine, likely hijacked to give out much more electricity than it should.” She moved to the next one. “Third...a 6 shooter pistol, ammo unknown.”

“Of course,” Harley grumbled. “Not only does he ignore that we’re fuckin Jewish, he sends horrible gifts.”

“Oh no Momma look,” Dicky said. He pointed to another stack of boxes, wrapped in shiny blue and silver Hanukkah paper. “He sent gifts for that too.”

And indeed, he had sent Hanukkah gifts to make the skin crawl. A pair of live rats in a box with what they suspected to be human meat. Several bloody Star of David and pink triangle patches. A set of human teeth strung on a bracelet. A new Star of David necklace with a note saying it was made from melted down dental fillings and jewelry of concentration camp victims (“Check that for any possible bad thing and then give it back. I want that,” Lucy said. “He probably thought that would be disturbing but it is a piece of my people.”). Presents five and six clearly went together — a Hitler Youth propaganda book and a swastika armband. The seventh present was an empty zyklon b canister. And the last one amounted to little more than a threat to destroy all future holiday celebrations. 

“He is an idiot,” Nana Esther said. “Harleen whatever did you see in the man?”

“I have absolutely no clue, Ma. We’ve talked about this.”

“Hmph.”

Each present was carefully catalogued, tagged, and stored in the locker set aside for them or otherwise appropriately taken care of. “These look like pet store rats,” Dicky said. “Not wild. I’ll take them and see if they can be rehomed maybe.”

“And I’m going to run DNA tests on this meat and the teeth,” Tim said.

“I’ll scan the necklace,” Babs said. “And see if I can find an appropriate shadowbox.”

“Thanks Babs,” Lucy said.

Once the troublesome gifts had been cleared away, Lucy looked at the others. “I don’t imagine this will go much longer.”

 

And in fact, she was right. While out on patrol for New Year’s Eve, she came face to face with him once more. As the clock tower struck twelve and the city wide fireworks display went off, she stood alone, facing him in a dark alley.

“Lucy, Lucy, Lucy,” he tsked. “Whateeever shall I do with you?”

“Leave me alone?” she asked, voice light. “Fuck off back to whatever circle of hell you came from?”

“My my, you are a rude child. I should teach you that lesson as well.”

“I’d like to see you try.” Her face was hard, stance ready. She very subtly tripped the silent alarm on her mask to let those back at the cave know she was in danger.

Joker laughed then, the sound a broken, terrifying thing. It bounced off of the walls, surrounding them, and Lucy held steady to the sound. “Two can play this game,” she muttered. Slowly, she tilted her head sideways as her lips split into a grin so wide it rivaled even his own. Joker noticed this and his laughter trailed off, uncertain. Lucy’s own laughter began to slowly, quietly bubble forth, welling up from her chest uncontrollably. She had meant to mimic him, to show him that he could not scare her with something she herself could do. But what came into being was something even more erratic and terrifyingly broken that she wondered for a split second if he had actually make her crack. And then. Then she realized that she was still fully in control and her laughter grew, filling the alley, spilling out into the street. 

Looking absolutely terrified, the Joker tossed a smoke bomb and ran, jacket flying behind him as he dashed away. Lucy watched him go, pleased with herself. 

When Tim arrived mere moments later, Lucy was winding down. “Where is he?! Are you okay?!” Tim asked, clearly worried.

“I’m fine,” she said, breathless. “He ran off. I scared him. He tried to...to scare me with his laugh so I...I went to imitate and what happened was even worse than his.”

When back at the Batcave, Tim made carefully sure that Harley was very out of ear distance then gathered the others to listen. Lucy smiled and let her laugh loose, and the others paled.

“Holy. Shit,” Dicky breathed.

Lucy furrowed her brow, worried.

“You’re better as his game than he is, princess,” Babs said. “And that’s something we definitely need right now.”

“A good guy with the powers of evil,” Lois breathed. “Best. Story. Ever.”

The laugh Lucy had at that was so good and pure that everyone had to smile.


	7. Cake and Crumbs

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Harley goes missing
> 
> TW: HOMPHOBIA, TORTURE, MANIPULATION, ABUSE

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And now, we have reached what is truthfully the beginning of the end. The final face off is coming, folks. Soon. Place your bets on who actually gets to kill Joker!

Dicky and Wally met at the bakery about fifteen minutes before their tasting appointment, happily greeting each other with a kiss. The mid-January air was full of snow flurries. Wally chuckled. “You’ve got snowflakes on your nose and eyelashes, fairy prince.”

Dicky laughed and rubbed his nose against Wally’s. “Yeah yeah. Tease all you want, speedster. I’m surprised you’re on time.”

That earned a playfully offended scoff. “I am wounded babe. Truly wounded.” He smiled. “I wouldn’t miss food for the world okay? Especially cake for our wedding.”

“True.” Smiling, Dicky glanced at his watch, then his phone. He frowned. “Huh. Momma hasn’t sent me anything about running late or anything, and she’s not here yet.”

“Maybe she’s driving. You know she refuses to text while behind the wheel.”

“Maybe…” Dick mused. “Well hopefully she gets here soon…”

“She’ll be here,” Wally reassured.

But as they sat down inside and talked with the bakery owner about what sort of cake they were looking for and what types of flavors and fillings they wanted, she still hadn’t arrived or sent word. When she still hadn’t arrived by the third or fourth flavor of cake, Dicky assumed there had been some sort of emergency at the hospital. As they wrapped up, and let the owner know they’d be in touch about their decision, Dicky kept looking at his phone. 

“Still nothing?” Wally asked, starting to get very concerned now. “That’s not like her.”

Dicky shook his head, already dialing, pressing the phone to his ear. It went straight to voicemail without even ringing and Dicky sighed. “Hey Momma. Just wondering where you are. We had a cake appointment today and you were supposed to be there. Let me know okay? I’m a little worried. Not like you to miss appointments. Call me back. Love you.”

“I’m sure she’s fine,” Wally said, trying to soothe both of their worries.

“I’m sure you’re right,” Dicky said, a bit distractedly. 

But as hours went by and no one had heard from Harley, the entire family began to worry. It wasn’t like her not to call, or at least have someone at the hospital call for her. It also wasn’t like her to turn her phone off or let it die. Having it on was a security blanket for her anxiety, something that kept her grounded in the present.

“I don’t like this,” Ivy murmured, arms crossed as she paced across the living room. “Something is wrong.”

Clark looked grim. “At this point, it would certainly seem so. I can’t find her. She was at Arkham today, though, and that place is pretty unreadable.”

“I’m calling them. And the hospital,” Ivy said. “I need to know where the hell my wife is.”

Both calls turned up even more worrisome news. “She left Arkham in time to get to that cake tasting,” Ivy said. “And the hospital only saw her for rounds this morning.”

Before anyone could say anything though, a loud beep indicated the intercom clicking on. “Guys,” Babs said. “You’re gonna wanna see this.”

 

“Play it again,” Lucy said, voice quiet but steely.

“Lu—“

“Tim, not  _ now _  I need to see it again.”

“No,” Babs said softly. “No you don’t.”

With an angry huff, Lucy pushed past her and pushed the button to start the video again. “Helloooo, Lucy. And assorted Bats and Birds and...others, I suppose. Thought it might be nice for us to have a little game. By now, I assume you’ve realized I’ve taken our  _ beloved _  Harley,” the camera panned to where she sat, taped and tied to a chair, looking royally pissed, “and have her in my care. We’ve spent some time catching up —“ The video cut away to a clip of Harley screaming, the noise muffled by the duct tape across her mouth, as she was shocked repeatedly with a cattle prod. It cut back to Joker then. “— and I must say, I hate that we’ve been so out of touch. And that I wasn’t invited to the wedding was  _ particularly _  hurtful. Mazel tov, Pammy! You did what I never wanted to, you kind soul, taking pity on her. I do not wish myself in your shoes. Anyway. This game.” He sighed. “Lulu, I really do wish you would let me help you unlock your full potential. So this game is mostly for you. I want you to meet me at the old amusement park on the boardwalk in five hours. Your mommy dearest will be safe while we talk and have a good clean round of fun as daddy and daughter. If you really must, I suppose you can bring one of your siblings, but they’ll have to sit out almost all the rides. While we’re having a good time, I’ll drop some hints about where exactly I’ve stashed her. If you can figure it out, and I bet you can, you little brainiac! Well then you can send someone to go get her and you can tell me your final decision. I hope it’s a yes. I’d hate to have to force you.” His grin was menacing. “Five hours, Lucykins. I’ll meet you at the carousel, huh?”

The video ended there, on a shot of Harley, head lolled to the side in exhaustion.

“No more,” Clark said firmly, cutting in before Lucy could say anything. “Lucille Darlene Quinzel, you are not watching that again.” She wilted, cowed by the use of her full name. “We will let Babs run it through her software while we make a plan.”

“....fine.”

“You are also going to call Jane.”

“She doesn’t need to know about this right now,” Lucy said. “She’s too far away to do anything.”

“She’s your fiancèe. She needs to know.”

Dicky handed her her phone, the line already connected and ringing. “Bonjour? Ça va, ma chere?” Jane’s voice was raspy with sleep.

“I...he took her, Janey. He took Momma.”

Jane was instantly awake. “Fuck. Put me on speaker.”

Over the next hour, they worked out a solid plan for what they would do. Tim would go with Lucy while the others called in as many reinforcements as they could to find Harley, using the clues Lucy would get from Joker to help narrow things down. 

“He’s lost his network,” Dick said. “So she’ll not be far from him, I guarantee it.”

The others agreed and everyone scrambled to sharpen weapons, eat, and suit up in time to get there. Damien came to Lucy in the showers, holding out two knife holsters. “They are extra long and extra sharp. Get what you can out of him and then kill him how you wish.”

Lucy looked at them for a moment and then took them. “Thanks, Dames,” she said softly.

He nodded once. “You are my sister, Lucille. Family is important.” He paused. “Your mother is also my family, although I have never had quite a word for what she is to me. We will get her back.”

It was Lucy’s turn to nod. “I know. Thank you for the reassurance.”

“Always. Now let’s go. Can’t keep Father Dearest waiting.”

Lucy hated the way that put a pit in her stomach.


	8. Good Clean Family Fun

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lucy spends several hours at the amusement park with the man who has tormented her for months.
> 
> TW: This whole chapter is basically torture and booby traps and endangerment. Also, Lucy is on the brink of sensory overload meltdown the entire first half.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well....this earned me like three "f*** yous" from my beta readers. Not the most a chapter for this has earned but enough that I'm pretty proud since this turned out actually milder than planned. And yes, Harley.s location is intended to be incredibly ironic and disturbing.

At the designated time, Lucy made her way into the park with Tim beside her, doing her best not to fidget anxiously. “Deep breaths, Lucy,” Tim murmured. “Deeeeep breaths.”

Nodding, Lucy took a deep steadying breath and turned towards the carousel in the middle of the park. The lights and music and sounds of the rides running were already driving her crazy and she reached for Tim’s hand instinctively, breath hitching. He gave her hand a reassuring squeeze and walked with her to the spot. It was eerily quiet beyond the standard music and assorted sounds, the people around looking terrified beneath plastered on smiles. The workers looked...robotic, glassy eyed, and Lucy wondered how he had managed that.

The loudspeakers crackled and his voice filled the park. “Everyone, our guest of honor has arrived! The party has truly begun! HAAHAHAHAHAHAAAAA!”

Lucy fought the urge to shrink and took another deep breath. There would be so many meltdowns after this. So many.

Before she could really contemplate that too much, the Joker appeared, strolling out from behind the carousel. He was dressed in a fancy suit, purple velvet tailcoat glimmering slightly in the park lighting, top hat perched on his head, pinstripe slacks immaculately pressed and shoes and spats shined within an inch of their life. “Oh Lucy, look at you!” he crowed. “You look marvelous.”

As the family had been planning, a new message had come in, stating that Lucy was to come dressed for a party. She could wear her mask, and Tim could be in his armor, but Lucy was to be in a dress and tights, preferably blue.

“I hate blue,” she said. “And I hate amusement parks.”

Joker tsked. “Keep that up missy and your mother and I will just have to punish you. Now, why don’t we ride the carousel and catch up, hm? I suppose dear Timmy can join us on this one.”

“Fine.”

And so it went, for the next few hours. Joker would lead Lucy to a ride, and they would get on, he would attempt to goad her into talking, into joining him. She refused to give in. On rides where Tim joined them, Joker refused to give hints, only giving them in the brief rests before rides started when they were entirely alone.

“The Green Arrow would feel right at home where she is,” was the first one.

“I do hope she’s not too cold,” was next.

The third one, “She’s not still afraid of the dark is she?” was delivered as the roller coaster cars climbed the first hill and he draped an arm around her shoulders.

As they boarded the spinning teacups, he said, “We used to go there all the time when I ran this town.”

Lucy was rapidly narrowing down locations with each clue, doing her best to put the puzzle together despite ever growing sensory overload.oo

Her fifth clue was, she suspected, an unintentional one on his part. “I’m so glad I kept her close,” he said happily as they buckled into their seats for the drop tower. “This way we won’t have very far to go at all once you’ve decided to join me, just across the park!”

It clicked then and Lucy wondered whether she should bide her time or not. The rude ended and she stumbled off of it, quite overwhelmed. Joker, extremely unconcerned, was now yelling at a couple of goons who had been following them around the whole time keeping people in line. Lucy stumbled over to Tim who caught her, looking worried. “Tunnel of love,” she managed. “She’s in the Tunnel of Love.”

“Of course,” Tim grumbled. He held Lucy up as he passed that along to the others.

“So, Lucy,” Joker said, returning to them. “One last place to go! One last clue! Come along.”

“Fine.”

 

Clark, Dicky, Kara and Jason landed in front of the Tunnel of Love mere moments later. “Wait,” Jason said, grabbing Dicky’s shoulder to prevent him rushing in. “We have no clue what sort of booby traps that maniac put in here to prevent us rescuing Harley.”

“Only one way to find out,” Dicky said.

“No, little bird. Calm down.”

Kara carefully stepped forward and looked around inside. “The tunnel takes a turn about fifty feet in. There are two doors on the side, but I can’t see through them.”

Jason looked grim. “Alright then. Guess we had better hope there’s no kryptonite, otherwise we’re sitting ducks.”

They made it to the first door with no issue, and found it unlocked. Opening it, however, revealed only the water filtration monitoring system. It was a good 30 feet to the next door, which was fine until, right at the door, there was a pop and then a fist on a spring came out to knock Kara off the ledge. Luckily, all it did instead was break off and make her blink. “Whoa!” Dicky exclaimed, pressing back against the wall. The water had suddenly turned a sludgy horrid green. 

“And this is why we are careful, Little Bird,” Jason said lightly. “We’re on the right track.”

Kara tried the door and glared. “Locked.” She quickly melted the handle away and pulled the door open, revealing a long, poorly lit concrete hallway. “Stay behind me, step where I step,” she said.

The others did as she asked, following carefully behind her as she picked her way down the hallway, peering around doorways looking for Harley and finding nothing. At the very end of the hallway was another door, not locked, but Kara cautiously opened it, expecting a trap. Nothing happened and she moved into the room, looking around. Harley was in the center of the room, wide awake if a bit dazed looking. 

“Momma!” Dicky cried. She shook her head vehemently and tilted her chin up.

Clark followed the motion and sighed. “Oooof course. I imagine that’s for Lucy?”

Harley nodded. She tilted her head towards the computer. Next to it, the rope for the bucket of ACME waste was looped carefully around a set of hooks. “Guess we’d better take care of that,” Clark sighed.

Ten or so minutes later, Harley was rubbing her wrists and moving her jaw around. “God, he’s still just as bad at that as he used to be,” she grumbled. “Where are he and Lucy?”

“The tower,” Jason said. “Tim is with them.”

“Then we’d best get going,” Harley said.


	9. A Loss of Innocence

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lucy ends the night with a bang, and the consequences are far reaching.
> 
> TW: EXTREME, GRAPHIC VIOLENCE

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, this is it. The final confrontation, the face off we have been waiting for. Thanks for sticking with me through the rollercoaster of this piece. Here is the end of the chase. I'm sure the title of the chapter gives it away, but if not, well, mind the warning.
> 
> Be wary; there be monsters this way

The elevator doors opened in front of them, and Joker led Lucy out onto the viewing deck of the central tower. “Ohhh, Lucy,” he sighed. “I’ve certainly had a wonderful time this evening. I think we should make this a regular occurrence, don’t you?”

“No,” she said, eyes carefully blank and neutral. “We shouldn’t.”

He seemed so disappointed in that statement, leaning against the railing as he looked out over the park. Like a king, Lucy thought. Like the Mad King. “Lucy, I don’t know what your mother told you,” he said darkly. “But you are a child of chaos, a monster born out of love between two more monsters. You do not  _ belong _  with such goody two shoes as your mother has raised you around and neither does she.”

Lucy laughed. “You really think you have that much influence over either of us? You’re that deluded?”

He turned to look at her. “Oh no. I don’t think. I know. You want the final clue to where she is? Because I think it really clenches the argument.”

Crossing her arms, Lucy raised her head and stood firm. “Try me.”

“You were conceived there,” he said. “Your mother screamed all night, loved everything I did to her. She—“ He was cut off by her quick, harsh slap across his face. Pressing a hand to his cheek, he glared. “You insolent child!” he hissed. Grabbing her arm, he yanked her close, faces mere centimeters apart. “I. Made. You. And I can unmake you JUST AS EASILY!”

“You are a fool,” Lucy said, voice soft and disarming. “Only a fool would try to claim any hand in the making of something that was handed to him already finished.” She smiled then, whole face stretching wide. “You didn’t make me,  _ Daddy _ . They did.”

Letting her go, he whirled around to see Clark and the others gently alighting on the viewing deck. Harley waved, smiling nastily. “Hey,  _ Puddin _ ,” she said. 

“Harley. How-how unexpected, so glad you could join us, I was just telling Lucy here how much I love you both.” She pranced over, the incredibly short tutu she was wearing twitching as she did. Her smile was still menacing as she stopped in front of him, projecting innocence. She booped his nose. “H-harls?” he said, hopefully.  _ Wham! _  A mean right hook caught his jaw and she whooped before leaping away.

Joker stared at her, mouth hanging open in shock. “I— what?”

Lucy saw her chance, and she took it. Unsheathing the knives Damian had given her, she crept up behind him and tapped his shoulder. He whirled around and she sank a knife into his gut. “Best joke ever, right?” As she saw the humor light his eyes one last time, she sank the other knife into his ear, and he was gone.

 

Lucy, in a sudden moment of exhaustion, let go of the knives. As the body fell away, she took a step back, dazed. “Lucy,” Tim said gently, taking her arm and guiding her quickly to the closest bench. “Breathe, Lucy, breathe.”

Nodding, she tried to take a deep breath. Nothing. She tried again. Still nothing. She started to panic, grasping desperately for his hands.

“Lucy, look at me, just look right at me,” Tim said, staying gentle. She did, eyes wide with sheer terror. “It’s over,” he said. “It’s over.”

“Home,” she managed, tears fogging her eyes then. “Wanna. Go. Home.”

“In just a minute okay, sweetie? First I need you to breathe for me.” Tim kept his voice soft the whole time, and discretely waved the others off each time they tried to come over. “Breathe and count to ten.” Slowly but surely, Tim got her calmed down. Clark moved the body, handing it over to the Gotham city coroner. They all agreed that it was clearly a case of self defense and a public service at that, quietly taking the body away and saying no more. 

When Clark returned, Lucy looked at him, eyes watery and half dried tear tracks down her face. Holding up her arms like she had when she was a small child, she said, “Please take me home.”

“Of course Lulu.”

She clung to him, shaking. Even once home in clean clothes, having had a hot bath, wrapped up in his cape and cradled in his lap as Harley gently sang to her, she shook, as if her soul itself had caught a chill. It had been justified, killing him, and she didn’t regret it. But the shock, the disgust she felt at knowing a human life, even his, had been taken by her hands, was overwhelming and left her mind reeling. Tim and Dami stayed close, not crowding, but close enough that she knew they were there. The others gave her space, knowing she would need time.

“I never want to kill a man again,” she said blankly.

“Hopefully, you won’t have to,” Clark said, holding her closer for a moment. “Not as long as I can help it.”

She nodded. “I—“ Her voice broke and she had to start again. “I hate him and I’m glad he’s gone.”

That earned her a kiss on the top of her head. “As are we, Lulu, as are we.”

The night slowly crept by, some of them dozing, others as wide awake as Lucy remained. Her shaking finally eased about three am, and her tears were entirely gone by the time the sun rose, turning the room golden.

“It’s morning,” she murmured, sniffling. “It’s morning and we’re still…”

“Still here baby,” Harley murmured. “Right here, where you belong.”

“Exactly where I belong,” Lucy murmured, slowly drifting off to dreamland.


	10. And An End

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lucy meets with big brother Jason to get his perspective on handling the trauma post-murder.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes hi hello I am so sorry this took so long to post but I was honestly hitting such a wall with this chapter. Getting Jason right was important to me and I feel like I still didn't nail it so I apologize in advance.  
> Anyway, here is the final chapter. I do have a very very very fluffy sequel where we get to see Lucy and Jane finally get married started and almost finished so look for that in the next couple of weeks/months. Also keep an eye out for other things I'll be writing and posting as I have a ton of stuff in the works!  
> Thanks for reading and enjoy!

The next few months were a bit of a roller coaster. More days than not, Lucy was fine, happy as a bee in a field of flowers. But on her occasional dark days, she plummeted rather low. Harley and the therapist worked with her on coming to terms with what she’d done, while the entire family banded together to remind her that she was loved, and had done a very brave, difficult thing. She spent a lot of time with Clark, and more time than usual with Damian and Tim, who both had more blood on their hands than she did. “You should call Jason,” Tim suggested one day. “I think he might have some insight you find very useful. Dames and I...less so. I know he’d be willing to talk to you.”

Curious, Lucy gave him a call. “Hey Jay,” she said, voice soft.

“Hey, kid. You doing okay?”

“Mostly, yeah. Few bad days here and there. I-- Tim said I should…talk to you,” she said, hesitantly. 

Jay was quiet a moment and then said, “Why don’t we go get coffee?”

And that is how Lucy found herself sitting on the patio of Sunflower Brews, hiding behind huge sunglasses as she sipped a latte, waiting on her eldest brother. He showed up a few minutes later, wearing a pair of beat up Ray Bans and a zippered hoodie to ward off the spring chill. “Sorry I’m late,” he said. “The kids were extra clingy today.”

“That’ll happen when you schedule a coffee date with their aunt on the day they usually have you to themselves,” Lucy reminded.

He shrugged. “You very rarely need me for something so in this case, Big Brother had to trump Dad.” He caught a waitress’ attention and ordered them both a drink before looking back at Lucy. “So you’re doing...okay? Good? Where you standin kid?”

She considered. “I’m...generally good. It’s a relief to have him gone, know for sure that he’s not going to bother us ever again…” She sighed. “But then it hits me that I killed a man, and regardless of him having been a piece of shit, that’s...a lot.”

Jason nodded, choosing his words carefully. “You know, none of us would blame you if you wanted to just...stop being a vigilante after that.”

“Why on Earth would I do that? Then he wins.”

“Just making sure you know all your options,” Jason said, smiling a bit. “Look. The first person you kill is always going to stay with you. I hope to hell and back that you never have to kill another soul. But if you do, I really hope that they affect you this much. It should never be an easy thing. There’s a reason Bruce doesn’t kill, and why Clark only killed once. It leaves a mark on you that you can’t walk away from. Joker...Joker doesn’t deserve any mourning. But your innocence, that freedom you had before learning what it is to take a life, that does deserve to be mourned. And I know your moms and therapist have likely already said this, Clark too, but you are in no way required to be okay, to pretend to be okay. Let the bad days happen. Feel them and know that it’s temporary, remember that you killed someone who needed to die, who likely would have killed or severely damaged you and others.”   
“That how you handle your bad days?”

Jason chuckled a bit. “Nowadays, yeah. But I used to be a lot less healthy about it. Booze and reckless nights of patrol where I went looking for worse trouble than I might have otherwise. Kara has made it clear in no uncertain terms that she is very glad I managed to start handling things better. I think the words “I almost dumped and/or divorced you” were mentioned.” Lucy giggled and Jason smiled. “It’s gonna take some time. You’ll have a lot more bad days where you feel like trash for having done it. But I hope the good days outweigh the bad for you. You’re already a million miles ahead of where I honestly expected you to be.”

She tilted her head. “I am?”

“Yep. I wasn’t expecting you to be so...mm not comfortable but accepting of the bad days. You know they’re gonna happen and you’ve come to terms with it.”

“Denying that they’re gonna happen seemed like more effort than it was worth,” she said with a shrug. “Eleven years of therapy and living with Momma sort of...put me in the mindset of just...dealing with them. Best I can, anyway.”

Jason nodded. “Good. If nothing else, don’t lose that attitude. It’ll see you through the worst of this just fine.”

The conversation shifted gear a little then, moving to other topics, but what Jason had said stuck around in Lucy’s head, letting her toss it around with herself as she contemplated. Byt time they were ready to go, they’s sunk in in a very comforting way. She threw her arms around him tightly as they got ready to leave. “Thank you,” she said softly, head resting on his chest.

“You’re welcome, baby bird,” he said, giving her a tight squeeze. “Call me when you need me okay?” There was no “if”, no room for argument. Just a firm reminder that as her eldest brother, he had her back, that he understood in a way none of the rest of the family really did except Clark. “I’ll see you for Shabbat, yeah?”

“Duh.” Pulling away with a grin, Lucy jumped to tousle his hair and then dashed off to her car before he could get back at her.

Jason watched her go, smiling. She still had a long road ahead of her, he knew, but he had faith that she’d make it. And if not, well she had him and the others to pick her up and drag her back into the nest until she was ready to try again.

**Author's Note:**

> Find us crazy Jusice Memers on Tumblr!  
> harleymeme-quinn.tumblr.com  
> minimeme-quinn.tumblr.com  
> supermememan.tumblr.com  
> robimeme.tumblr.com  
> Total list of us can be found with Kara at supersmolmemegirl.tumblr.com


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